CRAP MY PRETEEN SAYS

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I recently found out that my 8-year-old is considered a pre-teen. His 3rd grade teacher told me, and honestly, I was blown away. It seems far too soon. Ever since I found out, I’ve been paying a lot of attention to him, and have realized that he says some really interesting things that walk the line between being a kid and a teen. All of them scare the crap out of me. Here are a few examples.

 

Why are you so mad? I just wanted to kick the football in the living room. It’s not a big deal.

 

I don’t understand why I always have to wear pants.

 

8yo: I’m not going to hug you in front of my friends.

Me: You were all about my hugs last night when you crawled in bed with me after a nightmare.

8yo: (rolls eyes)

 

(Long exhale) Showers are so stupid.

 

Everything is funny as long as it’s happening to somebody else.

 

I don’t want to eat a potato! You don’t even care!

 

None of my friends have to wear a belt. Belts are for old people. Like you.

 

8yo: When I grow up I’m just going to play video games.

Me: How will you eat?

8yo: I’ll just eat at your house.

 

What? I don’t have any money. That’s your job.

 

8yo: You should get me a cell phone.

Me: You are 8. Who would you call, Grandma?

8yo: Yeah!

 

What are some of the ridiculous things your 8yo says.

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  • Ashley

    I’m totally with him on a lot of this though – I don’t understand why I always have to wear pants (bonus as a woman though because I just wear dresses and leggings every day. take that patriarchy!), and showers are stupid, and I think you should care that he doesn’t want to eat a potato.
    I can’t wait to see what he says next.